No Full Frontals Allowed

Ahh, the memories. Hey old CTAG youth? Remember the "no full frontal hugging" rule?

Please Watch.

The Hyenas Did Not Touch Him

Because I grew up in a non-liturgical tradition, creeds (well, at least formal ones) were not really a part of my early education. Although I might argue that singing Alive, Alive, Alive forevermore can turn into something of a rosary, that's probably as close as we got. :o)

Anyway, I came across this today, and love it. It's called The Maasai Creed. The info below is from Wikipedia. Favorite line: "the hyenas did not touch him." Sometimes we need to remember that God guarding us for the hyenas is a very, very good thing.

"The Maasai Creed is a creed composed in 1960 by the Maasai people of East Africa in collaboration with missionaries from the Congregation of the Holy Ghost. The creed attempts to express the essentials of the Christian faith within the Maasai culture. Jaroslav Pelikan, one of the greatest modern scholars of creeds and their history, considers the Maasai Creed to be an excellent example of the bringing together of universal faith and local experience (http://speakingoffaith.publicradio.org/programs/pelikan/index.shtml)"

We believe in the one High God, who out of love created the beautiful world and everything good in it. He created Man and wanted Man to be happy in the world. God loves the world and every nation and tribe on the Earth. We have known this High God in darkness, and now we know Him in the light. God promised in the book of His word, the Bible, that He would save the world and all the nations and tribes.

We believe that God made good His promise by sending His Son, Jesus Christ, a man in the flesh, a Jew by tribe, born poor in a little village, who left His home and was always on safari doing good, curing people by the power of God, teaching about God and man, showing the meaning of religion is love. He was rejected by his people, tortured and nailed hands and feet to a cross, and died. He lay buried in the grave, but the hyenas did not touch him, and on the third day, He rose from the grave. He ascended to the skies. He is the Lord.

We believe that all our sins are forgiven through Him. All who have faith in Him must be sorry for their sins, be baptised in the Holy Spirit of God, live the rules of love and share the bread together in love, to announce the Good News to others until Jesus comes again. We are waiting for Him. He is alive. He lives. This we believe. Amen.

Heart Rhythm

I wrote this while sitting in the hospital prior to our god-son's birth. Kayvion arrived 11 weeks early, but less than two months later was able to go home, safe and healthy.
_____

For years I wouldn't have been able to sit in this room. To spend the night would have been too painful, but to sit awake an even worse punishment. To work away to the rhythm of a heartbeat, disguised only slightly by the protective fluid between it and the monitor... a special version of water torture for a barren woman.

But over the last two days I've spent many hours sitting here, listening for a heart rhythm that's speed is comfort, for slowing down is what caused mother and child to be here. And I sit. And I chat. And I work and am thankful for a hospital with wifi.

And I'm not bothered by a rhythm that has become my white noise. It's actually a comforting sound. That little rhythm is the sound of my god-son, who doesn't need to arrive until December.

And this tells me I am stronger than I thought.
And that my God is a better healer than I sometimes remember.

Adoption False Labor

Take a deep breath.
Take several deep breaths.

Change position. Maybe take a walk. Maybe rest.

Perhaps a warm bath to help the body relax.

More deep breaths. Slow, deep breaths.


Women with traditional pregnancies aren't the only ones who experience the pains of false labor. Those of us who have "paper pregnancies" can also need the same advice when time is getting close but it isn't really the time yet.

Our paperwork for fost-adoption certification in California is being finalized as I type. And yesterday, I received a phone call from our social worker. The voicemail I picked up later (I'm going to be re-thinking that technology-free meeting during this "labor" period of our process), it didn't start with the "You're certified!" I expected.

Instead, it was "There are three children..."

*insert heart rate increase here*

And then she began to describe them a bit, their current situation, that they are adoptive free (aka - their .26 hearing to terminate parental rights has already taken place), and that she has info pages to forward to me if we'd like.

For months - well, honestly, YEARS, we've been waiting for this phone call. And here it is, before I thought it would arrive. But at the same time, what we have to pray through, discern through, is whether or not it's really labor - if these are really our kids about to arrive. Because there's also a good chance it's just false labor, and this too, shall pass.

That may sound cold and inconsiderate - it's not. We need to hear from God on what is best for these three adorable kids, and whether our home and family is going to be that. We know what we feel God has already placed in our hearts, so if these cuties don't line up with His direction - we have to make those decisions.

Keep breathing, Kathy.
Just keep breathing.
Because it's definitely not a time to push.

Chicken Soup for My Husband's Soul

The beginnings of dinner are set to simmer and create yumminess.

"It depends on what the meaning of the word 'is' is."

This is not a political statement, or a bash session. Or at least, I'm not bashing who you might think.

In September of 1998, Bill Clinton made that famous statement: "It depends on what the meaning of the word 'is' is." {I remember this whole era well because it was my senior year of high school, I was highly attuned to the poltical and government world being an Extemporaneous Domestic Affairs Speaker (nerd speak for the fact that I competed in public speaking competitions and talked about government and social issues in America) and later that Fall I was sitting in the House of Representatives gallery as below me history was made when they voted to impeach the President, something that had only happened once before.}

But back to my point.

This is not a presidential inquiry. There is no parsing of words here.

There are things in my life that just plain "is."

And they are wrong.
And they shouldn't exist.

Because we often pray, "Father, search me, know me, reveal any sins that I need to take care of," just to cover up the fact that we really do know about the sins we are avoiding taking care of. Those that are blatant in our own hearts.

Our church is entering a time where the Holy Spirit is moving on a grand scale, working, and not just corporately, but individually. So as we come in humility and repentance, asking God to let us be a part of all that He has for us... let's not purger ourselves by denying what is obvious, even if it's only obvious to God & the deepest, most honest recesses of our own hearts.

"So throw all spoiled virtue and cancerous evil in the garbage. In simple humility, let our gardener, God, landscape you with the Word, making a salvation-garden of your life." - James 1:21 (as paraphrased by Eugene Peterson in The Message)

First Days

First days are rough.

It doesn't matter how exciting, how much anticipation has been building, how great or how sad the event, the first day is always rough in some way, shape, or form.

Today is my "first day" back in the office following kids camp and vacation. Next week is our church family camping trip, so there's prep for that as well. Plus that to-do list from before I left, this week's reoccurring meetings and tasks, Fall Studies and House Parties to get my brain wrapped around, follow-up from baptisms, new believers and discipleship stuff, building information, and oh - that layer of dust on my shelves that needs my attention.

First days are rough.

So as I sit at my desk and look at the piles, old and new; look at the projects, old and new; look at the tasks, old and new... I decide.

I decide to step away from the desk and sit on the couch.
I decide to crank up the cello solo station on Accu Radio.
I decide to focus on God and pray so the rest of my day can be focused.
I decide to make a new list. Who cares if they're old tasks, it's a new page.
I decide that rough is simply not the right answer.

Anticipation, encouragement that so much is going on, so many lives are being touched and changed, and I get a front-row seat to watch. And I remember that sometimes, I even to be a character in the actual event, and play a role in the stories.

And I sigh.
And I thank God.
And I breathe deep.
And I get to work.

Why, Thank You Mickey!

Thanks for that great reminder, Mickey! You're right, my birthday is getting close.

14 shopping days left!!!!!

20 shopping days left!

Okay people, there's only 20 shopping days left until my BIRTHDAY! :o) I'll be 28, in case you were wondering or didn't bother looking at my Facebook profile. You only have three weeks left!

Oh, and if you really love me, and my husband - our 7th anniversary is two days later. ;o) Did I mention that my love languages are gifts and words of affirmation? And I feel like words of affirmation (like well-written greeting cards) are gifts to my heart... so guess which one's the primarily language?

Here's what you can get me:

• Crate & Barrel has this cute sugar/creamer set where the creamer looks like a little milk carton. I know, random, but I saw it and I likey.
• Douvet set (including the actual douvet blanket)
  
• Hammock for my backyard
  
• Hammock stand
• Books
• Strawberries
• Plane Tickets to the East Coast for sometime this fall after we have our kids
• A vehicle large enough to hold said children
• I'm addicted to Burt's Bees lip balm - either the peppermint oil or the pomegranate oil one, in stick form so my fingernail doesn't get all gross
• Speaking of nails - mani/pedi
• A MASSAGE!!!!
• Charms about my husband (hint, hint, Benjamin)
• Red Envelope has this Year of Seeds thing that is just stinkin' adorable
• An oval domed "shadow box" type frame for me to finally do that art project with my wedding flowers
• Chimes for our back porch - but only ones with really deep, rich tones
  
• creative/modern/classic bookends
• An herb garden of my very own
• ice cream maker
• wok
• an immersion blender
• golf lessons
• purses (must be approved by either Barbie P or Joslyn H)
• Bath & Body Stuff in wild honeysuckle
• Alaskan Cruise
• Lenses for my camera - I have a Canon Rebel XTi, I need a good portrait lens, and a good zoom
  
• Flash for my camera
  
  

Okay, well that should at least get you started, right?

The Joys of Giant Doors

Back when we were still squatters, we had no doors.

You see, we're a church plant. And we were borrowing some offices, which don't get me wrong, were a huge blessing. For three years we had a place to do small group gatherings / classes, and work during the week. At first just a couple of people were there during the day, down the hall from the billion dollar business that lent us some square footage. But then there were three, then four, and at times eight of us trying to be productive.

And quiet.

That was a big problem for us. Not only are we all of the preacher-type variety, we're pentecostal. Those two things put together and the word "quiet" isn't really an option, you know? But there was a problem. We had no doors.

I remember staring at the grey walls we called home and thinking, "If only we had doors. Lord, I'd really like a door." We adapted, we adjusted, and we continued to shush each other so we didn't disturb said billion dollar business.

And then we moved - into our own building.

Oh, we're loud alright. It's like we're making up for it. But even better - we have doors. And God didn't just come through and say, "Okay, here's a nice, normally little door for you since you asked so nicely (read: persistently)."

He gave us huge doors. Huge.

The door to my office is 9 feet tall. It's giant. And I love it.

You see, God cares about the obscure requests. And not only does He care, He comes through - with style.

Kings 4:15 -- And he said, "Call her." And when he had called her, she stood in the door.

(Yeah, seriously out of context, but it kinda works, you know?)

After the Fact

For the last week, Ben and I were back in Springfield, MO, where we lived for 6 years. In fact, it was ten years ago this August that we both moved (without knowing each other) into our dorm rooms at Evangel University. We spent the last eight days going from place to place, restaurant to restaurant, to hang out with people. People we love and miss.

Being back after leaving was really wierd. I'll be honest. It was strange at times. We've been in Sacramento for over half the time we were in Springfield. Yet, it feels like we were there so much longer. That feeling comes from the fact that we experienced our college days, our single days, our young married days, all there. Plus, we had several "sets" of friends we experienced live with while living in the midwest.

It was surreal - walking around places that used to be part of our everyday lives.

In fact, I felt like an outsider reading someone else's autobiography. I knew all of the characters, the script and storyline-- but it wasn't "me" playing the leading anymore. I am no longer that person. My perspective has changed in the 3 1/2 years since we left.

But even in that "after-the-fact" feeling, I so enjoyed my time with friends.

• The people who packed our home with us before we left, there they were to welcome us. I love them
  
• The campus that has changed so much, but the names on doors feel familiar and new buildings still oddly like home
  
• A church building that still displays signs I made
• Restauraunts feeding us comfort foods of memories past
• Laughing till your sides hurt in a home that you never lived in, but it feels like you did
• A wedding with people you don't even realize are in the network of your life
• Spending daily activities with your best friend, just like old times before you each had a "permanent roommate."
• Tornado sirens...

Thanks for the fun, my friends. You are loved.

For the Birds...

Here's a link to the impromptu message this past Sunday at Mars. It was great fun to be able to share with our church family, even though last minute due to Pastor's illness. He's doing just fine now (kidney stone), and the sermon has been posted on the church website. God showed us Himself, two people dedicated their lives to the Lord, and many of us were touched by the great time of worship & prayer at the end of service.

http://MarsHillFamily.com/sermons

The last piece of furniture

Last night was big. We picked up the last piece of furniture or equipment we need to have our house ready for Fost-Adopt certification. Once the last papers are in, we'll be in the final interviews process with our social worker, but the house...is ready. Vitamins are locked up, detergents are "inaccessible," rooms have beds, linens and dressers (thanks Morris Fam, Nelson Fam, Haggard Fam and freecycle!), carseats are stacked, stuffed animals are piled... it's ready.

Which also means that right now, it's kinda empty.

This is par for the course in the adoption world. You hurry up, get ready, and wait. This is also when people love to tell you, "Any day now," "This waiting is great character building," "God's timing is best," "There's a reason for this delay." Can I just advise everyone--don't say these things to an adoptive family. We know. Really, we do. But that doesn't necessarily make waiting any easier. We've already waited so many times in various processes, that another wait isn't exactly welcome.

Am I absolutely confident that God's timing is prefect? YES. But most of the time, we as believers end up sharing platitudes with each other that aren't helpful. Reminders of the timing just remind me how long it's been, how many starts and stops there have been. How long the crib and other beds might remain empty still. And none of this is encouraging. Sorry, just being honest here. And don't worry, I'm not offended by anyone who's ever said these things to me. I'm also fully aware that once my home is full of kids running around, I will have mother's amnesia as to how long this wait was (this is a paperwork pregnancy, after all).

So the point here... God's timing--absolutely amazing. I'm just announcing to the world that I'm one step closer to Him making something happen. :o)

testing....